Note to self: You are allowed to spend your energy, particularly on things that bring you joy.
I’m working on it. Still.
When everything comes at a price, it’s hard to ‘dare to do’.
With the pandemic still ongoing, it’s tricky to know what on earth I’m meant to be doing.
With the dishwasher needing unloading, for example, it’s easy to feel that my limited function should be spent on helping around the house.
With my friends suffering so much, it feels wrong to be making progress after that 2020 relapse back into Severe M.E.
Working on giving myself permission to live a tiny, little bit (within reason, because my body is still ill and SARS-CoV-2 is having a whale of a time mutating and going unregulated).
I gave it a go recently by going with my sister and two of my niblings to a farm park very close to home.
Oh the joy. Oh the guilt. Oh the frustration. Oh the elation. Oh all the mixed feelings that tag along when you have a chronic illness…
IMAGES: 1. Anna, a white woman with brown hair and glasses, on her orange mobility scooter. A child is riding it with her. Their face is blurred. 2. A child looking across some stepping stones. 3. A baby on Anna’s lap.
'M.E. myself and I' by Anna Redshaw 