I have lost the ability to make decisions. I find them quite distressing. Simple choices have come to feel as if they are the most important decisions in the world. I don't know why. Perhaps it is a lack of confidence; that I have lost confidence in my physical and cognitive abilities, so how can … Continue reading Decisions, decisions
Every now and then I have a complete crisis of confidence. Not regularly, and not for very long, but every now and then. I question why on earth someone like him would choose someone like me. I wonder if my friends have only stuck around through pity. I struggle to see myself as more than … Continue reading Self worth
It can be hard not to feel pathetic sometimes. If I have big plans in the evening, and by big plans I mean leaving the house, I tend to spend all day just sitting and waiting. It would be lovely to be able to potter around beforehand, but my energy is so precious that I … Continue reading Pathetic
Thank you for all of the well wishes ahead of tomorrow ☺️ I'm feeling very organised and grateful to my little team of helpers. It'll be a BIG day for me and I will struggle for a while afterwards but it is always worth it and I feel very strongly about raising awareness of this … Continue reading The Final Countdown
The baking has started, the tea sets are out of storage and the information leaflets have been printed off. If you'd like to follow Blue Sunday on social media, I will be using the hashtags #BlueSunday and #teapartyforME and posting pictures and videos on the Facebook event. Any donations of the price of a piece … Continue reading Tea party prep
Waiting. Still waiting. I'm not entirely sure why but my most recent appointment with the doctor had me fighting tears. Crying during appointments has happened many a time before but never with my current GP because, to be frank, she treats me better than any other GP has over the course of my illness. Sure … Continue reading Waiting. Still waiting.